I swore I’d get that disco patch this time around, I swore I’d stick it out here long enough to do that… But now I’m not so sure. I’m fed up and sick to death of hte attitudes of the people here. Not to mention being so far from home and my safety net of people I can talk to. I’ve got friends that are trying to get me to go back to NM, and I’ve got another friend who gave me the name of an online program that I can finish my medic with (I don’t mind online since I”ve already completed one didactic program already).

If I move back to NM, medic will only be a way to make more money while I go to school for my ADN/BSN/NP. I still am thinking of winding up as an ED NP… But I don’t know. I really thought I could do this, but right now it feel like I can’t. THe only thing I don’t like is the fact that it feels like I’d be running home with my tail between my legs. But then again, hurt pride is better than a hurt body.

I’ll post a longer entry tomorrow when I’m not at the station and after I can hopefully rest.

  • Anonymous


    Do you need my foot in your ass, or do you prefer gentler motivation?

    No one LOVES paramedic school. It’s a grind, and they breeze through the shit they should spend time on, and dwell on the simple, mind-numbingly boring shit for far too long. And half the time, the shit they’re teaching you will be proven wrong in 10 years anyway.

    And this will be true almost anywhere you go.

    You get out of school what you put into it. If you’ve got the discipline to excel in an online course, then you’ve got the stamina to stick it out where you are. If you keep bouncing around looking for the perfect program, you will never get the disco patch, because there ain’t no friggin’ perfect program.

    If the attitude of the people around you is toxic, then finish school, get your patch, and be a different medic than they are. Once you’re a medic, you’ll have many more potions to find a place you like better.

    Till then, suck it up, buttercup.

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  • Thehappymedic

    In my experience running home is often justified. If you love what you do you will find a way to make it happen. Put this notion of pride aside. Your future self will not look back are your current situation with the same weight, if so I’d still be making tortillas at the Frontier on route 66.
    The disco patch Can be elusive at times, impossible at others, then one day you look over and its buried in a stack of old papers. A symbol of a destination long passed that took so many sleepless nights, missed opportunities and chances to have a normal life.
    You’ll get it in your hands, admire it for about 5 minutes then hear yourself asking “I wonder what else I can accomplish? ”
    Take a deep breath and be more than those around you are, the rest will come naturally.


  • Justmyblog

    I agree with Ambo Driver, 100%. Remember, I’m in the same boat you are right now. Most parts are boring, attitudes suck, the hard stuff you have to learn on your own because no one feels like teaching it. I’m exhausted, my family doesn’t remember who I am. But I, and you, are stubborn and smart enough to lick this thing. And when it’s all over we’ll step up & show them all. Git ‘er done, boy! :)